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Holiday Party Hostess Gift — Entertaining
Creative Etiquette Solutions

Holiday Party Hostess Gift — Entertaining

Do you have to bring a holiday party hostess gift to the host when you attend a Christmas party? Are we expected to bring a wrapped gift? We’re seeing that some people bring a gift, but not so many. Can I merely send a thank-you card from my partner and me?

–PT, Wilmington, DE

Here is the drill on the holiday party hostess gift. Keep to the spirit of the event. The next day send a holiday card adding a short hand-written note saying something such as this, "Dear Alice and Ted, We loved your party. Thank you for including us and introducing us to your many friends. Looking forward to seeing you both in the new year. By the way, we love your library and your wonderful book collection. The pheasant pâté was sublime. Again, thanks ever so much for sharing the joy of Christmas. Cheers, Charlie and Paul" Gifts are not required when you attend a holiday party. However, a thank-you note is a must. Even if that thank-you note is scribbled on the back of a Christmas or New Year's card. Or is delivered as an email. For those who have given you a hostess gift in the past, find small boxes of chocolates you can slip into your coat pocket to leave for the host; be sure to attach a tag with your name. Make it easy for your host: a small gift like that does not require an acknowledgment. 9843cf79bb587039b3a5c671dce9a481

~Didi

Best Houseguest Presents — Best Hostess Gifts
Creative Etiquette Solutions

Best Houseguest Presents — Best Hostess Gifts

My recently divorced father and I have been invited to visit with his old college friends in New York City. We were going to stay in a hotel but they are insisting that we stay with them in their large apartment. What would be a good hostess present from a father and daughter to our hosts who have everything?

–NS, Barrington, RI

Send a white orchid plant from the greenhouses at Venamy Orchids, at Can You Buy Phentermine In Australia, in Brewster, NY. They make two delivery trips a week into Manhattan and, despite a small charge deliver, the quality and cost of the plant far surpasses expectation. An orchid plant might be better than flowers if you don't know if they are going away after your stay. The orchid will still be in blooming when they return.

Orchid plants need little care; two ice cubes can be placed on top of the moss every two weeks.
Also, with flowers if you don't know their colors, they may be finicky about colors.

Handcrafted chocolates are also a huge hit. In that case you would arrive with the chocolates, perhaps from La Maison du Chocolat at 1018 Madison Avenue, online at Buy Phentermine Online Uk Only, where there are delicious assortments. initiation_2_1

A coffee table book is also good, but it has to be of interest to your hosts. And, recently printed, such as BILL JACKLIN's NEW YORK. 9781857599671

As a houseguest you would arrive with something in your hand to present upon your arrival. A beautifully wrapped book or handcrafted chocolates are always welcome.
Orchids or flowers should be delivered.

If you decide on a floral arrangement, two of the best florists in New York City are Miho Kosuda, Ltd for exotic flowers from foreign countries and Belle Fleur, which uses only fragrant garden roses as opposed to warehoused roses. For a more conventional arrangement, Renny & Reed, at 505 Park Avenue, are well-known and well-respected.

The arrangement shouldn't be over-whelming in height or girth or be designed as a long centerpiece.
Ask for a coffee table or end table size.

Steer clear of giving tabletop linens that may not fit the decor, or the size of the table. Scented candles can also be tricky when your hosts are not keen on the scent of tuberose or patchouli. Also, wines, ports, and handcrafted bourbons are challenging. You don't want to make your host feel he has to open that expensive wine that doesn't jibe with the dinner menu.

In other words, if you don't know wines and spirits, or exactly what your host likes, don't guess.
For instance good friends bring my husband a bottle of handcrafted bourbon made in small batches because he really appreciates them.

The key to giving the perfect present is to give your host something they really enjoy and not something you think they should have. They like orchids, give them a splendid orchid, they like good bourbon, give them the best. It is also welcomed words to the host who is presented chocolates or wine to be let off the hook when the guest says, "Please, know that you can save this for another occasion."

~Didi

The Importance of The Handwritten Note — Relationships
Creative Etiquette Solutions

The Importance of The Handwritten Note — Relationships

This is about relationships. A good friend’s last remaining parent died and I’ve been trying to be as helpful as I can. Do I still need to write her a personal note? Or would that be just another note she’d have to acknowledge? Should I send her a condolence card or do I have to write a letter? She asked me if she needs to write to 150 people who ‘Liked’ the photo of her parent that she posted on Facebook to announce the parent’s death or can she just ‘Reply’ with a quick ‘Thank You’? If she thanked friends in person for their flowers at the funeral, does she still have to send a sympathy acknowledgement?

–EH, Boston

Handwriting is the most elegant form of communication in relationships. The whole exercise of expressive note writing whether in sympathy or gratitude -- even a few lines on a commercial condolence card and finding a stamp (who has those any longer?) -- is part of the mourning process. You can send your friend a handwritten note on your best stationery (even if its left over from your wedding) or a thoughtful greeting card. BillMiller59242542781T

Trust me. It will make you happier to write her a note. In many instances, including that of the survivor, writing is cathartic for mourning. There is a de-escalation process where the survivor reciprocates, acknowledging in writing the death of their parent to friends and family; when she sends acknowledgement cards that include a short message she's accepting her grief. Expressing the loss of that relationship is therapeutic for the writer as well as the survivor Hopefully, these simple guidelines will make it easier to understand: With the case for handwriting your message, the evidence is evident. We now know from recent brain scan studies that early handwriting helps kids to learn how to read, and that keyboards don't have the same effect. Forming the letters with a pen/pencil enables children to break the code by producing more brain activity than merely viewing letters on a keyboard. There's more evidence that handwriting lecture notes, compared to typing on a laptop or iPhone, improves learning for college students.

The gratitude letter that your friend would be writing in return is positive psychology. It is written as a specific expression of thanks to a person who has been especially thoughtful, kind or important to her. Apparently, 99% of the time the gratitude letter works. And why wouldn't it?

As I said before, handwriting is the most elegant form of communication. It makes you happier, smarter and more endearing. In most instances, handwriting is another tool for thinking, expression, creativity, and communication. BillMiller59242543012

A good handwritten letter

is personal and is personalized (when you send a tweet, email, text, or FB message, you should still follow up with a handwritten note or card when you know the person well.)
represents the writer's undivided attention (unlike an email or phone call while multi-tasking at work.)
is a thoughtful gesture appreciated for its effort, time spent writing it and finding a stamp. People remember who wrote a heartfelt letter and who sent a text.

The gratitude letter

for a gift of any kind or any occasion acknowledgement is appreciated. It sustains the relationship. If I spend half a day making a meatloaf and cherry pie to bring you while you're recuperating from a knee replacement, I am grateful to receive a handwritten message of appreciation.
is appreciated when someone goes out of their way (again, spending time on you) to introduce you to someone who becomes your boss, mentor, investor, or business partner; or pulls strings for you.

A condolence letter

can be sent anytime, the sooner the better, however, there are no rules or time constraints.
should never include unhelpful phrases (see below).
is NOT about being profound.
is all about acknowledging a death and expressing genuine sympathy.
is not the place to compare losses (saying you've experienced the same loss could annoy the person).

What NOT to say:

It's for the best.
I/we know how you feel. (You don't know how they feel, no matter how well you think you know the person.)
He lived a full life.
My mother had ______, too.
How are you? Obviously, they're hurting
It was the right time -- because she may have been let go.

What to AVOID:

Don't promise to help, if you're not sure you will.
Don't go on too long, because brevity is key.
Don't go into the drastic circumstances of the deceased.
Don't say anything even vaguely religious, unless it is appropriate.Don't sign off with just Sincerely, which sounds cold.

When you don't know the person well, how to sign off in closing:

With sympathy,
Please accept our condolences,
Our sincere sympathy,
With caring thoughts,
With deepest sympathy,
Warmest condolences,
With deepest sympathy for your loss,

When you know the recipient well:

With love,
With loving memories,
Thinking of you,
Our thoughts are of you, our hearts are with you,

Add the deceased's name in the closing -- even if it is a pet:

Stella will never be forgotten,
Toby will live on in our hearts,
Louis will remain in our hearts,
We will never forget Elaine,

Much appreciation to the Printery, Oyster Bay, New York,

for the use of all of the exquisite samples above.

~Didi

Death of The Thank-You Note
Creative Etiquette Solutions

Death of The Thank-You Note

As a working mother I’ve found it a hell of a lot easier to email one generic thank-you note which I personalize slightly for each person before clicking send. Alternating between adding ‘thank you for having us at your holiday party’ to ‘thanks ever so much for the delicious tin of cheese straws.’

My sister says the recipient will assume I copied the email and wrote the same thank-you note to everyone. Isn’t it better to send a thank-you note any way I can and get the job done with an email, rather than agonizing over writing by hand every note and never finishing the arduous task?

–EH, Roxbury, MA

A handwritten thank-you note trumps any other kind of expression of gratitude -- even a phone call.

Take shortcuts if you have to with an thank you e-card (such as a Jacquie Lawson @ Phentermine Canada Buy) but when sustaining the relationship is of the utmost importance to you, use that stationery or the correspondence cards in the back of your drawer and write a heartfelt letter of appreciation with your favorite pen.

A thank-you card or letter is best mailed within two weeks.

Reasons to write a thank-you card: To express gratitude for support, whether for a job interview, reference, letter of recommendation; to acknowledge the receipt of a present for a holiday, birthday, wedding, christening, communion, anniversary, graduation; in appreciation for a condolence letter for the loss of a loved one; or for having been invited to a professional or social event.

From an early age, children who learn to write thank-you notes expressing their thanks for a specific present develop a livelong skill, the art of showing appreciation:

Dear Uncle Tom, Thank you for my bike I like having a basket to carry my ball and a bell to ring. Dad is teaching me how to ride it. Love from, Charlie B.

Thank You 8_edited-1

~Didi

When to Send A Thank-You Note for A Holiday Party
Creative Etiquette Solutions

When to Send A Thank-You Note for A Holiday Party

About sending a thank-you note for a Christmas party.

We accepted an evite to a holiday party and attended. We did not bring a hostess gift. Can we send a thank-you card after the fact and that’s enough? Or do we have to send our hosts a gift?

–Anonymous, Newport, RI

Send a thank-you note when you know you won't be reciprocating with a return invitation. The reciprocation for an invitation is a return invitation. Often that's not possible. For instance, if you don't entertain, or live too far away and our visiting home briefly, say, for the holidays. A guest is never required to bring a gift to a party or send one post-party. You were invited because your host enjoys your company. However, if you don't bring a thoughtful token hostess gift, you would reciprocate with an email thank-you note pointing out your view of the highlights of their party (a person you met, the beautifully decorated house, the food, eggnog, etc.). At the very least: An evite invitation is reciprocated with an email expressing gratitude; a paper invitation, is acknowledged with a handwritten note; a verbal invitation by phone or in person is reciprocated with a phone call thanking the person for having invited them. BillMiller59242262278

Thank-you note card samples courtesy of The Printery at Cheap Phentermine Nashville Tn.

~Didi

Houseguest Etiquette
Creative Etiquette Solutions

Houseguest Etiquette

What’s the update on houseguest etiquette? The dos and don’t of being a good houseguest — and host — these days?

–J.P., Greenwich, CT

What's the update on houseguest etiquette? The best houseguest doesn't make his bed before asking his host How should I leave the bed? Nobody wants to sleep in your once delightfully dewey sexually scented sheets. Take them off, take them all off, then loosely fold them and either leave them at the foot of your unmade bed or deposit them into the laundry basket. Especially if you have children in tow, empty your wastebaskets of any soiled diapers, sticky popsicle wrappings, and you used dental floss, etc. The exception here is when the houseguest(s) are either family or invalided in some capacity. The host gift/present isn't your most important responsibility. Making the cleanup after your departure not torturous for your host is key for continuing the relationship. Showing up at the door with anything more than a smug expression and hug isn't necessary, if you're determined to pitch in and make yourself useful - or at the very least amusing. Arriving with a book, game, flowers, chocolates, cheese, or a bottle of wine is expected, but you can get away with being a houseguest extraordinaire by pitching in with anything from cooking, weeding, resetting a laptop, walking the dog, taking out the garbage, or simply emptying the dishwasher or setting the table. The best thing you can say is not, "Thank you for inviting me," but "Let me know what I can do to help," and then make suggestions ... Invite your host(s) out to at least one of the following: breakfast, lunch, dinner, or drinks at their local pub. Or offer to have pizza delivered. Most important, before you arrive, communicate with your host about your arrival and departure timeframe so your host can make plans. At that time ask, "Is there anything I can bring that you don't have locally, such as .........?" Part of that conversation should include a question about whether or not you can bring your beloved dog or cat. And if not, find a recommendation for a respected kennel nearby. Are you bringing a child who will need a babysitter or childcare while you're visiting? Then the information to set that up should be put in motion before you arrive. When a guest has dietary concerns meaning you cannot eat certain foods such as nuts, gluten, dairy, meat, or shellfish, these restrictions should be only casually mentioned. Don't make a big deal of your stipulations, because you want to fit in by being a self-sustaining guest - not a needy one. If, unbeknownst to you, your host is planning a lobster bake, he needs to be forewarned to provide you with an delicious alternative. Cheapest Phentermine Uk Where To Buy Phentermine In Memphis Tn Another question to your host when you're finding out what's in store for you on your visit is dress code. Are there any dress code restrictions: jacket & tie, jackets & dresses, no jeans, no ties, etc. Will you need all white attire to play tennis? Can you rent golf clubs, a bike, surfboard, or kayak? You would no more bring an unannounced date with you than leave your room untidy. No wet towels or bathmat left in a heap on the floor creating mildew, because you've loosely folded them and left them with your sheets and pillow cases. Buy Phentermine Slimming Pills Uk Remember that your host is not the owner of a B&B. Even if you're family, your family wants to be respected - so spend quality time with them. Ask your hosts to join you on one of your walks, or invite them to share a meal with your friends, whom you may also be seeing. A good guest should make sure to give his hosts some time off while he's visiting. Invent a trip or an errand, anything that will give your hosts a chance to catch their breath. A seasoned host knows to stock a guest's bathroom with a couple of new toothbrushes, fresh toothpaste and soap, shampoo, a hairdryer, shower cap, and comb. Sunscreen, deodorant, body lotions and potions, over-the-counter pain reliever, tissues and bottled water are always an added consideration. An extra towel and pillow are most certainly appreciated. When you get home, send a grateful recap in your medium whether it is a text, email, or thank-you note: "You made my summer, thank you very much for a wonderful weekend of memories." Mention the flowers thoughtfully placed on your night table, along with books you've been trying to find time to read. Buy Phentermine From Canadian Pharmacy

~Didi

How To Be The Best Guest
Creative Etiquette Solutions

How To Be The Best Guest

What are the dos and don’ts for being the best guest? We’re going to a wedding this weekend and then the following weekend to my boss’s house for a barbecue. After that we’ve got a cocktail party that’s an engagement party. In general, what should we remember to do and not do?

–TGW, Providence, RI

Guests who may possibly wish to be invited back, want to know how to be the best guest. The ideal guest is a self-sustaining one. As soon as you know your plans -- whether you are able to attend or not -- respond to the host directly or simply follow the cues for replying to the invitation. When there is a cut-off date for the RSVP, be sure to answer promptly. Otherwise your hostess will have to phone to find out if you're coming in order to get an accurate headcount for the caterer and/or bartender. Or just to know herself how much food to prepare. When responding, make it clear as to who is replying by giving your first and last name, as well as the name of your partner or date when you are answering for both of you. A guest should never invite their own guest without asking the host first. Should your plans change, let your host know ASAP, so he doesn't get stuck paying for your two empty place settings. (Caterers are given a headcount in advance to insure there is enough food, and have to charge your host for your dinners if you are a no-show.) On the other hand, if you arrive with an unannounced date, you may find there is no seat at the dinner table for her. It is even more humiliating for your date than it is for you. What if she is suddenly the 13th guest and the host only bought 12 lobsters? Don't assume an invitation includes your whole family -- or your dog. You don't want to be embarrassed by showing up with your small children only to find there are no other children their age at the party -- or that your host is allergic to dogs. Having to leave Fido in your car on a hot summer night is a bad idea. Check ahead of time if you're not sure. If the invitation -- whether it is for a wedding or a cookout -- isn't addressed to your whole family, then the entire family is probably not invited; even if you are bringing the coleslaw and two bottles of wine. 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If not, wear your best dark business suit. Your host is being considerate by offering you the option of not having to rent or borrow a tuxedo. Examine the invitation. The more formal the invitation card, location and time, the dressier the dress code for the guests. Usually the later in the day the start time, the dressier the party. A lunch picnic is far more casual than a five o'clock cocktail party. Even in the summer, after six o'clock is time for party clothes. (Guys would not wear button-down collars after six, and don't have to wear socks with loafers.) When the event is hosted at a restaurant or private club, the dress code rule Jacket and Tie can apply-- especially in the evening when all male guests are required to wear a jacket and tie. If you show up without one, you will be loaned the use of a jacket or/and tie for the evening. What to bring as a hostess gift? For parties in an informal setting ask ahead of time, "What can I bring?" Or when you arrive ask, "What can I do to help?" [caption id="attachment_99522" align="aligncenter" width="335"]Where Can I Find Cheap Phentermine Young women and men holding drinks standing around bbq[/caption] Make suggestions, "I can pick up some ice-cream or cold beer." Don't arrive empty handed especially when you're bringing a date or family. You would not bring anything room temperature that is normally served chilled, because there may not be space in the fridge. If the party is potluck, be sure to communicate with your hostess to find out if another guest is already bringing coleslaw. Would she rather you brought potato salad? Find out how many guests are coming to assure your decadent chocolate cake that serves twelve is indeed large enough. Buy Phentermine Pills Online Upon arrival, be sure to greet your hosts and thank them for inviting you. Be a self-sustaining guest. Not a needy guest. If it's raining, find a place for your coat and go look for the bar introducing yourself to other guests along the way. A guest with food allergies should eat ahead of time and not expect her host to drop everything to make her something special. Leave your dietary needs at home or bring a small container of prepared food for your personal use -- that does not have to be heated up. If you don't know anyone at the party, be a self-sufficing guest by introducing yourself and your partner. "Hi, I'm Didi Lorillard and this is my husband Rod Stewart. We're related to the groom." Or, "The host is our neighbor." Stating your connection with your host or guest of honor is a sure way to initiate chitchat. Even though it is polite to go through a receiving line at a formal wedding, it is not mandatory. But be sure to talk to your host or the wedding couple later. Waiting in the receiving line, however, does give guests the opportunity to meet and chat with strangers informally. Circulate and circumnavigate to figure out the seating for dinner. Is there a table card directing you to sit at table number 6? If so, is there a place card with your name on it? At an unseated buffet ask a few people if they would like to share a table, so you don't end up wandering around looking for an empty seat while balancing your filled plate and wine glass. Can I Buy Phentermine In India At a wedding, for instance, a good guest not only talks to the host and/or guest of honor, but asks them to dance. He also talks to the person on his left and the person on his right while seated or standing in the buffet line, receiving line, or in line for the restroom. Take advantage of opportunities to be social informally. About a gift. For an engagement party, shower, and wedding find out from other guests where the couple have registered their wish list and send a gift from the store registry, which will have the recipients address. Ahead of time, type in at least one name to a bridal registry search, such as Buy Adipex From India to find options for a gift in your price range. How much to spend on a gift? To find the optimal amount to spend, roughly estimate the cost of hosting you and your partner for the event. If you think it cost $75 a person to host you, then you and your partner would give a wedding present valued at $150. For instance, a wedding could cost the host anywhere from $75 to $1,00 or more per person.) Obviously, if you're a student, retired or unemployed, a thank-you note would suffice. Arriving with a boxed gift to a large wedding is dicey. Cards detach from wrapped packages and go missing or end up on the wrong present. Is a gift mandatory? No. But be sure to send a thank-you note to your host or a handwritten note or card to the wedding couple or birthday boy wishing them well. It is not always possible, but if it is, be sure to thank your host before saying good night. Can I give a toast? Who gives a toast? A better question is: should I give a toast? Probably not, unless the occasion is truly informal. If you do, make it as short as possible. The more formal the wedding or party, the more formal the toasts. For a formal event certain guests are handpicked to stand up and raise their glass to give a toast. Toasters are often chosen ahead of time so that there are not too many toasts that go on way too long. A good host doesn't want to bore guests who won't get the often subtle nuance of a toast. When to leave? When the invitation states a timeframe arrive shortly after the arrival time and leave a bit before the end time. A good guest never overstays his welcome -- no matter how good of a time he is having. You never want to be the last guest to leave the party. At a three hour cocktail party, where a meal is not being served, don't stay more than two hours. The timeframe for a cocktail party is more about having guests pop in and out, and seating is not a priority because the intention is to encourage guests to circulate. Never sit down, because you can get stuck without an exit plan talking to a bore. A good host not only makes a point of introducing guests to other guests they may not know, but he also makes an effort to stand by the exit to make sure those who are driving don't need a another cup of coffee before hitting the road. Friends don't let friends who are high drive. About tipping. The only time you are prompted to tip is at the end of a party where there is a vendor handling the valet parking. Tip the valet who brings your car a couple of dollars. Within two weeks after the party, be sure to have your thank-you note written and mailed. If the invitation came through an email or text, then you can thank your host with a return email or text. However, thank-you notelets are always more memorable. Purchase Phentermine 37.5Mg

~Didi

Teenage thank-you note
Creative Etiquette Solutions

Teenage thank-you note

Is it necessary for a teenager to send a thank-you to the parents of the girl that invited her on a cruise, when she paid her own way?

–Name withheld, Providence, RI

Even though her way was paid, she benefited from the trip because it was organized by her friend's parent. She broadened her horizon, and she was chaperoned by the other child's parents (to some degree). It could be a thank-you card on which she writes a short heartfelt sentence thanking them for the opportunity and the memories. Exceptions would be: if the teen had a horrible experience on the cruise or if her own parent(s) were planning on reciprocating with a return adventure at another time. Should the teen balk, have her email, and not text, her thank-you note saying why she appreciated the cruise. Personally, I would use almost any teaching opportunity to encourage children not only to thank, but to prioritize making thank-you note writing a natural response of appreciation. Socially, as well as in business later on. Studies show that polite people are more apt to get ahead in life and become leaders.

~Didi

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