• Tips On Holiday Tipping
  • Creative Etiquette Solutions

You may also be interested in:

Tips On Holiday Tipping

I find the whole idea of tipping at Christmas confusing and bad ass difficult to figure out. There are people who support my life that I really need to tip because if they didn’t like me, I would have to find someone else to do what they do so well. But there are those that you’re stuck having to tip.

Who do I tip and how much?

–HG, Miami, FL

It sounds as though you may have several categories where you tip individuals during the holidays. Remember that a tip is never necessary or required.
      Although some apartment buildings send residents a list of the building's employees, which you may want to acknowledge with the suggested tip, if you want continued good service throughout the year.
Weekly Worker
      Housecleaners and housekeepers are the best compensated because they not only know your secrets and bad habits, but they pick up after you when you're too busy to do certain things for yourself.
      The median may be to tip $50, but you have to evaluate the tip by how many hours a month they spend taking care of your home.
      If you pay $15 an hour and she works for four hours a week, her Christmas tip should be at least $120, two weeks salary, for a year's worth of taking care of you.
  • What does the service of a full time domestic, such as a nanny, personal caregiver, cook, butler, housekeeper, mean to you? It could be worth anywhere between a week and up to a month's salary, plus a small gift.
  • Although, if you're just tipping because it is expected, apparently you can squeak by with a $50 holiday tip.
  • When there is a long running history of care, loyalty and devotion, then $250 would be appropriate.
Daily Worker       Dog Walker, Nanny and Caregiver, or any other daily domestic help, would receive, again, a tip equal to two weeks of salary. 
      Other professions typically receive a gift card for $20, or just that in cash.
      Cash is always preferred. Gift cards are always appreciated, but if there is a problem with it or it has expired, then the worker is stuck in the embarrassing situation of having to explain that they were not able to use your gift card. Then you have to hem and haw and make good on the card or give cash to make up for the mishap.
      Boxed and wrapped gifts are not so popular. Unless the worker has specifically asked for an electric tea pot, but when there is a problem returning the gift, the worker is put on the spot.
       To get back to the cash, make the gift look nice and festive by placing the cash in a holiday card, with handwritten words of thanks.
At the end of the year, it is all about how dearly you appreciate the quality and frequency of the service, your relationship with the recipient, how long you've been using their service, and your budget.
  • Then factor in your location, because workers commuting in dense urban locations are apt to have a more lengthy and expensive commute.
      Also under consideration:
  • Homemade gifts, such as propagated plants, baked goods, or homemade jam, are charming and show your sincere appreciation when your budget doesn't provide for end of the year tipping.
  • Already readily tipping your hairdresser, manicurist, masseuse/masseur, or trainer per service? Then your holiday tip doesn't have to be as generous.
  • Mail carrier, paper deliverer, garbage collectors, etc., who may or may not be the same person every day or week.
  • Doormen and building janitors are usually tipped once a year by the resident and not on a daily basis
Handwritten notes of thanks are always appreciated no matter how generous the gift it accompanies. They show a lot of about your style and grace.

~Didi

Read More…

  • Tipping the Wine Steward and Sommelier — Restaurant Etiquette
  • Creative Etiquette Solutions

You may also be interested in:

Tipping the Wine Steward and Sommelier — Restaurant Etiquette

When the advice of a wine steward or sommelier is accepted, do I tip him or her aside from tipping the waiter and if so, how much?

–LB, Manhattan

About tipping extra for fine wine. No matter how well you know your wines, the advice of a wine steward or sommelier can indeed be reassuring and even helpful. A hearty few words of thanks may be all that is necessary.
  • Traditionally, you would tip 15% to 20% of the cost of the meal including the wine, before the tax is added. It is always good etiquette to tip a sommelier, but it is not mandatory when the cost of the wine is included in the bill.
  • On the way out the door, you can, of course, slip the sommelier cash, again 15%-20% of the cost of the wine, along with your generous words of appreciation.
On the other hand, if you do not like the recommendation, the wine steward should find you a different wine. You shouldn't feel stuck or intimidated into drinking a wine that isn't to your taste.
  • The wine steward should exuberantly say, "Let me find something else."
If you're going to pay for a great bottle of wine, you should drink what you like. If the wine is particularly good -- a real find -- you may want to slip the sommelier an extra $5.  

~Didi

Read More…

  • Should You Expect Thanks for A Tip?
  • Creative Etiquette Solutions

You may also be interested in:

Should You Expect Thanks for A Tip?

We actually followed your advice about giving a holiday tip — to a point.

We didn’t tip the sanitation workers because they are never the same guys.

We had always tipped the paper delivery person because we want our paper every day; he then included a thank-you card with the next paper.

For the first time, we tipped the mail carrier and he thanked us personally and then in a greeting card.

My husband and I use the same hair-stylist and we give her one nice holiday tip and she was very grateful.

Contrarily, we tipped our once a week cleaning person with a cash tip in a cheerful holiday card and she has not said a word. Since we each work sometimes up to ten hours a day, a cleaning person, who comes in three hours a week, is part of our budget. Was she expecting more?

–LT, Weston, MA

When you give a holiday tip you shouldn't expect a thank-you note, because it is usually an unsolicited gift. Unlike, for instance, when you attend a wedding and are given information about the bridal registry, from which you are expected to send a present. It is hard to say without knowing her, if your house cleaner was disappointed by her tip or she simply didn't know that she should acknowledge it. You could certainly show her the paper deliverer's card and say, "To think he comes every day, rain or shine, and still finds time to thank us for his holiday tip." If that not-so-subtle hint doesn't register, figure she doesn't want to get it and don't expect even a word of thanks next Christmas, let alone a card.  

~Didi

Read More…

  • Houseguest Tipping
  • Creative Etiquette Solutions

You may also be interested in:

Houseguest Tipping

As a houesguest is it appropriate to ‘tip’ the housekeeper following a weekend stay with a close friend or family member? We are by no means high-maintenance, tried to make our stay as low-impact as possible while in residence, and emptied the wastebaskets and stripped the beds before leaving. But we did, of course, incur extra laundry and the rooms would have to be cleaned following our departure.

As I would in a hotel, I felt I should leave something for the employee who would clean up after us but my husband was not sure that would be looked upon favorably by our hostess. Your opinion on the matter would be welcome.

–Hoping To Be Asked Back, New England

About the etiquette for houseguest tipping. Mention to your host that you would like to leave a tip for their employee: house cleaner, cleaning lady, or housekeeper. Ask how much of a tip she would suggest --keeping in mind that some hosts don't want their staff to expect a tip, when not all guests are thoughtful enough to leave one. The amount of the tip would depend upon the length of your stay, the number of people (a couple vs. family) and how much time the staff member spent assisting you by, say, ironing your husband's trousers or your dress, or walking your dog. It goes without saying that when someone went out of their way to help you connect to the Internet or babysat your child for the evening, you would compensate them. For a couple such as yourself, a twenty dollar bill -- preferably in an envelope with the person's name on it and the words "Thank you" -- would be a fair tip for a weekend visit. However, you would check with your host saying, "We wanted to leave Mary a token of our appreciation, if that's alright with you?" Especially when you're a houseguest abroad or in the islands, be sure to ask what the custom for tipping is in the household. In some cases, the host may even suggest that you leave a tip and let you know how much is expected.

~Didi

Read More…