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My husband doesn’t approve of my daughter-in-law breastfeeding in public, which to him means in front of the family. He doesn’t want her breastfeeding at the Thanksgiving dinner table. My husband is the step-grandfather of the baby. Specifically he says he doesn’t want her breastfeeding at the Thanksgiving dinner table. We love her and the first grandchild, but I have to keep peace in the family. How should I handle this?

–JP, Arden, NY

Nip it in the bud. Tell your son ahead of time that his step-father doesn’t want to be seeing breastfeeding at the Thanksgiving dinner table. He needs to bring a nice cover up for the baby when his child is breastfeeding. Explain how his step-father feels. Say it makes him uncomfortable, queasy, because it is not something he is used to seeing. And that, maybe, over time he will come to ignore his apprehension when she feeds her child in front him.

But for now, Thanksgiving, she needs to cover the baby while feeding.

• Offer to provide her with a baby guilt or muslin swaddle or muslin blanket (at adenandanais.com) to drape over the baby’s head and the mother’s breast.

• Otherwise you should tell your son that she should go into another room while the baby is nursing, since it is his step-father’s home as well as yours. Even though the nursing mother is the guest.

~Didi