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Do my boyfriend and I have to give a wedding present for a destination wedding? It seems to us that buying a gift on top of paying for airline tickets to their destination wedding in Cabo San Lucas, a hotel room for three nights and most of our meals, should be enough. We have student loans to pay off and we’re planning our own wedding. Also, we did give them an engagement present.

–destination wedding guests, Brooklyn, NY

The wedding couple will know that you’ve gone to great expense to attend their wedding and they’re appreciative. Since you’re close enough friends to have been invited to their intimate wedding, they know your circumstances and understand it has been a stretch for you both to attend their destination wedding.

Our best advice is to send a small gift from their bridal registry, which is something they really need and have asked for, within a year from their wedding date.

One year gives you time to find the perfect place where you can complete, say, a set of wine glasses or cereal bowls on their registry. It is not about the amount that you spend, but about the thoughtfulness of the gift.

Most newly weds like to entertain and can never have enough wine glasses. Look for the couple’s registry at home goods stores in your area or theirs, such as Bed, Bath and Beyond, Williams Sonoma, Scully & Scully, Macy’s, etc.

~Didi