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I love my live-in boyfriend. We’ve been together three years, and he wants to get married, but I’m hesitant because we haven’t worked out the money thing. We really don’t have the money we need to save for our ideal wedding. Not that we have to have fancy champagne and a catered dinner.

      How do I get Billy to focus on the fact that we need to talk about money and make plans. We never discuss our finances. Sometimes he has money, sometimes not, but he pays half the rent and utilities. What’s a wannabe bride to do?

You don’t need to read studies to tell you that the most common problem most couples face is the hesitancy of talking about money. You’re certainly not alone, Ms. Wannabe bride, in your wish to take stress out of your relationship by dealing with money more responsibly.

      “Financial infidelities” are the greatest concerns for most couples. Hiding spending is a relationship breaker.

• What are your pet hidden expenditures?
• How much of that can you each commit to the wedding pot?
• How much of that can you spend on shared experiences such as date nights, vacations and entertaining friends?

Investing in your long term relationship is something to work on together. Try cutting down by spending more time and money on having shared experiences.

• When friends and relatives learn your plan, they may even offer to pitch in to help pay for your wedding. Wouldn’t that be helpful!