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About family etiquette. For the past three Easters, I’ve picked up the check for our family dining out on Easter Sunday. For years while she was raising her children, my sister cooked Easter lunch at her house with roasted leg of lamb, ham and all the trimmings. When my sister returned to the work force, I started taking everyone for Easter lunch at a restaurant. My company is downsizing, I’ve taken a pay cut and I cannot afford to treat 20 people. My sister is making a lot more money than I am. As the big brother, how can I gracefully get out of playing host at Easter?

–PW, Stony Brook, NY

With Easter marching closer, it is a bit late to cancel. This is about the family etiquette of hosting Easter lunch in a restaurant. The best you can do is to talk to family members about pitching in on the restaurant bill. Can you ask your sister to split the bill with you?

Alternatively, would you consider organizing a potluck Easter lunch in your home with everyone bringing their favorite dish and a bottle of wine or a dessert? It will take some coordination, and you can purchase prepared food, and use recycled paper plates, glasses and utensils. Easter is all about keeping family together, and not haute cuisine.

Over the next ten months, talk to family members about how best to keep up the tradition of bringing the family together for the various holidays.

~Didi