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How do I politely ask my sweet lumbersexual boyfriend to shave his beard for Thanksgiving? My conservative urban parents don’t like the hipster look. They would rather he did not arrive in a woodsman’s jacket (that is actually a Barbour) and appear at the Thanksgiving dinner table in a plaid shirt and woolen hat. Without the hat, his scruffy hair is hard to explain. He spends more time than I do in front of the mirror grooming his hair, including trimming his beard. My dad, grandfather and brothers will all be in a tie and jacket.

–lumbersexual girlfriend, Brooklyn, NY

Why don’t the older generations understand why the aesthetics of the effeminate metrosexual and the urban ruggedness of the lumbersexual are wonderfully appealing? Tell your hipster boyfriend you want him to make a compromise and trim his face and head way down so he doesn’t have to wear a hat. In return, he does not have to wear a tie and jacket. He may not like the idea of being a metrojack for Thanksgiving, but he really cannot wear a hat at the dinner table.

~Didi