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For the most part I keep my head down working eight hours a day and eat lunch in my cube. One of  520 6-by-7 foot cookie-cutter cubicles. No window or door. Four neighbors, to the north, east, south and west. I know more about my coworkers than they would want anyone to know.

I know too many secrets that are private information about medical problems. For instance, medical information the company would consider serious in terms of health insurance and promotions. There are affairs between married coworkers. One has a guy crush on our scruff-chic boss. My question is this, how do I let them know that their secrets are not safe? If I know their secrets, others must, too.

–keeping my head down, Chicago

These sound like serious secrets that would jeopardize a career.  It also sounds as though you want to be nice.

Go ahead on an individual basis and tell each neighbor to your north, east, south, and west that if you know their secrets, others must have heard them too. Warn them to watch what they say on the phone and in person.  You better not put anything in writing or say anything while in a cubicle or corridor.

Look for a silent conference room and say, “Can I have a word with you in private?” Or simply walk out with them at the end of the day to tell them.

To show your sincerity show your open palms so they get the sense that you have no alterer motive or ax to grind and trust you. What you’re saying is what it is and they need to listen.

~Didi