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I am the mother-of-the-groom. The bride’s parents are paying for the wedding and asked me how I wanted the names on the invitation. I told the bride’s mother to only use my name and not the groom’s father’s name, but I don’t know why. My son’s father and I get along very well. Is there any way of making this right with the groom’s father because he is very hurt? I have no excuse as to why I left his name out of the invitation. The invitations have already been printed and mailed.

–C.N., Seattle

Be honest with the father-of-the-groom. Tell him if you had it to do over again, you would have had his name included on his son’s wedding invitation. Say you weren’t thinking clearly at the time. Ask your son to make a special toast to his father at the rehearsal dinner or at the wedding reception and have him encourage his father to stand up and take a bow. There is no need to explain why the groom’s father’s name was omitted from the wedding invitation. It sounds as though you’ll make it right by encouraging your son to pay special attention to his father. Your son could also ask his father to make a short toast, of no longer than two minutes, to the newlyweds.

~Didi