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Didi, my son and his fiancée are finishing college two states away from where we live and where he was raised. Being a minister, there are many in our city who have invested in the lives of our children. It’s not realistic to imagine any of our friends would travel two states for the wedding which, by the way, will be held in a venue with limited seating.  My wife and I are considering hosting a reception for the bride and groom after the wedding in our hometown. Is it more appropriate to send an invitation to everyone, or an announcement after the event which would include an invitation to the reception?

–B. G.

You and your wife would be hosting a post-weddding reception to celebrate the marriage of your son and his bride. Using your own information, it would go much like this:

Dr. and Mrs. James Brandon Wilson
request your presence at the 
post-wedding reception for our 
recently married son and his wife
Mr. and Mr. William Edward Wilson
on Saturday, January 16th, 2015
Six O’clock in the evening

Morrison Parish House
Trinity Church
Newport, RI

RSVP by January 10th to: 401-855-9900
or reception@trinitychurchnewportri.com

The above invitation for the post-wedding reception acts as both an announcement and an invitation. You would not send both an announcement and an invitation to the same people. By word of mouth, the word will get out that your son was recently married in another state and you and your wife are hosting a post-wedding reception. It is important to use the phrase “post-wedding” so that people won’t think they are missing the wedding, which in fact will have already taken place. You should find out where the wedding couple are registered for gifts, so that if friends and parishioners ask, you know. In my opinion, since the wedding will have already taken place, you would not include wedding registry information on the invitation.

On the church program the Sunday following the wedding, find a way to include the names of the newly-weds and the date and location of their wedding.

~Didi