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Recently I ran into  a friend of mine’s ex-boyfriend at a bar and we hung out, but didn’t hook up, even though the chemistry was flowing both ways. He intimated that we should go out and typed my number into his phone. While they were dating my friend complained bitterly about him and said they broke it off because they didn’t have much in common. Should I go out with him?

–Zoe, Providence

It wouldn’t be just breaking the girl-code, but the decent-behavior-code as well, if you hooked up with your friend’s ex without talking to her first. If they had been dating for over six months, she may be vulnerable, angry and feel you’re betraying her.

Don’t rush into anything without talking honestly to your friend first. Tell her you ran into him, you hit it off, and he asked for your number. Promise her that you won’t share any information with him about her. She may be surprised and even disappointed in you. You and he may or may not become a couple, you and she may or may not stay friends, but that’s life.

~Didi