My question is about how to help my girlfriend overcome her painful shyness.
–SF, Kenya, Africa
Thank you for your question about how to help your girlfriend overcome shyness.
My hunch is that she’s shy about having sex. You can’t assume from anyone’s behavior that they are consenting to having sex.
- Your girlfriend needs to feel safe about her feelings. Sex is performance based. She may not understand how to talk about sex or how to decide whether to consent or not.
- You and she need a more nuanced understanding of consent. Verbal and visual signs are significant indicators. Talk about sex openly.
- No subject should be off limits.
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