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  • Wedding Gift — In-Kind as A Service
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Wedding Gift — In-Kind as A Service

We have a wedding to attend at a farm event space under a tent on July 31st, at 3:30 pm in Rehoboth, MA. I have two questions: one is about a wedding gift and the second is about what I should wear?

We are distant cousins but close to the bride. My teenager daughter is in the wedding party. I am also, doing the bride’s hair on her wedding day. I feel awkward about charging her for doing her hair so we have not discussed it.

If I charged her, what do I give for a gift?  If I don’t charge her, what do I give for a gift? There will be myself, my husband and my daughter at this wedding.

–Jodi, Rhode Island

Your wedding gift of your time is an in-kind gift. When a service you can provide is requested, you are giving the bride your time and your expertise at her request as your wedding gift.

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Doing your cousin’s hair is a big deal. However, because the hosts will also be paying to host your husband and daughter, you would send a small gift from the couple’s bridal registery.

It is not so much about how much you spend on a bridal registry gift — because you are already giving your time in-kind–, but that you give the wedding couple something –once again– that you know they want.

  • You should be able to find info about where they are registered on their wedding website.
  • If the wedding couple are asking for money, estimate what it will cost your hosts to host your husband and daughter. Approximately a hundred dollars per guest, but your daughter would be half price because she wouldn’t be consuming alcohol.

The later in the day the start of the wedding, the dressier the outfits. Since your cousin’s wedding is at 3:30 pm, you don’t want to be overdressed looking like a wanna be bridesmaid.

  • It is going to be bloody hot and humid in Rehoboth, MA, in mid-summer so don’t get too gussied up. If the tent is not air-conditioned, it will be even hotter.
  • Wear a really nice sundress that can pass for a cocktail dress. It is more about the quality of the dress than the dressiness of the outfit.

Keeping in mind that the wedding is taking place outdoors on an event space farm, keep cool in one of these looks:

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Honey We're Home Stripe Maxi1.

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~Didi

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